THE INVASION OF TIME

Part One

Sue: Is there anything I should know?
Me: No, it’s just a regular four-parter.

May I rot in hell.

Sue: This had better be good. We’re due a good one. Who’s David Agnew?
Me: He doesn’t exist.
Sue: Is it because they were embarrassed with the script, or were they getting around the BBC’s rules and regulations again?
Me: It’s co-written by the producer and the script editor.
Sue: Right, so this story should sum them up nicely, then.

The Doctor is ...

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95

UNDERWORLD

Part One

Sue: It’s the Bristol Boys.

I’ve been schooling Sue between stories because the experiment is the…

Sue: They were responsible for the giant prawn, weren’t they? I don’t like the Bristol Boys very much.
Nicol: What are you talking about?

UnderworldYes, I persuaded Nicol to join us for Underworld; let’s call it payback for overcooking my chips last night. Anyway, the episode begins with a stunning vista that features a cornucopia of stars ...

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112

THE SUN MAKERS

Part One

Sue: Is there anything I should know about this one?
Me: Only that it’s late 1977 and context is everything.
Sue: I would have just turned 16… Oh look, it’s Robert Holmes. I feel better already.

The Sun MakersA nervous man named Cordo is loitering in what appears to be a very drab corridor.

Sue: This reminds me of Brazil.
Me: The country?
Sue: The film.

It’s an astute observation (it ...

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48

IMAGE OF THE FENDAHL

Part One

Sue: I don’t know why we’re bothering any more.
Me: What?
Sue: Well, according to some of the comments on the blog, Doctor Who is a complete waste of time now.
Me: For the last time, stop reading the comments.
Sue: The general consensus seems to be that it’s all downhill from here. I was hoping it was going to get better, not worse.
Me: Don’t listen to them. They’re talking nonsense. There are plenty of great stories still ...

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83

THE INVISIBLE ENEMY

Part One

Sue: Great. Invisible monsters again. I bet this is another cheap one.

A spaceship is navigating an asteroid belt.

The Invisible EnemySue: Oh shit, it’s a spacey one. I don’t like the spacey ones very much. I like it when it’s set in the past and…
Me: And they have wooden cabinets.
Sue: Yes, exactly. Look, I told you this would be cheap – someone’s pretending to be an astronaut ...

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HORROR OF FANG ROCK

Part One

Sue: What do I need to know about this one?
Me: Well, it’s a new season and there’s a new producer in charge.

She didn’t ask me for a name. That’s how interested she is.

Me: Oh, and this story was made in Birmingham.
Sue: Fascinating.

She couldn’t care less. In fact, it’s probably fair to say this story gets off to a very rocky start. Sorry.

Sue: New season. New producer. New shit special effect.

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THE TALONS OF WENG-CHIANG

Part One

The Talons of Weng-ChiangSue: Six parts. Oh joy. This had better be ****ing good, Neil.

Sue wants to know when Talons was originally broadcast.

Sue: I would have been 15 years old, so I was out playing badminton when this was on. And during the last part, I was probably playing golf.

Backstage at a Victorian Music Hall, a Chinese magician and his dummy are discussing their latest performance with ...

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112

THE ROBOTS OF DEATH

Part One

Sue: Oh no. Not Chris Boucher again.
Me: It’s pronounced Boucher, actually.
Sue: Whatever.

A sandminer is churning up the landscape on a desolate and dusty planet.

Sue: This looks good. They’re really selling it to me. The camera movement certainly helps.

The sandminer is run by robots.

The Robots of DeathSue: These robots look like walking BAFTAs. Were the BBC trying to be subliminal, hoping they’d win something?

The human crewmembers ...

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THE FACE OF EVIL

Part One

Sue: Is there anything I should know before we start?
Me: Well, the first episode was broadcast on New Year’s Day 1977.
Sue: So any adults watching this would have been hungover. Fair enough.
Me: Oh, and there was a six-week gap between this story and the last story.
Sue: I didn’t even get six days off. Thanks.
Me: In fact, the BBC promoted this story as a season opener. But it isn’t. Not really.
Sue: Okay, I’m bored ...

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